France: they hate vegetarians Part 1

Ahhhh Paris. The veritable no-man's land for the vegetarian that doesn't eat fish.
I Eurostar-ed there with some sort of naive optimism (ohhhh the cheese, the pastries, the wine) only to return to England; fat. bloated. bitter.
Oh well, no one said it would be easy, but it wasn't all bad...



We choose Aux Lyonnais because it looked great. A beautiful restaurant with lots of etched glass and chandelier action.
After deciphering the menu with our phrase books, we figured out that the entire menu consisted of meat, except for the desserts and a plate of boiled vegetables.
I refused to eat the boiled vegetables on principle as they were clearly there as a joke. So I went straight to dessert and ordered a Saint-Marcellin cheese, and asked if the kitchen could fix a salad.



The salad turned out to be a massive bowl of bitter dandelion leaves. It was palatable to begin with, but a quarter of the way in my tongue started to feel like I'd been chewing on a battery. The cheese however was amazing. As soon as I liberated it from its cute little terracotta pot and cut in, it all oozed out in a deliciously gooey way, waiting to be scooped up with some rye bread that arrived on the table in a miniature sack.



Dessert was a more straight forward affair - with no dandelion leaves in sight. A souffle with cherry liqueur flavoured cream spooned into the middle. Yum yum.
I would also like to mention that the wines we had in this restaurant were amazing, thanks to Ellen, our on-table wine expert.






Strolling around the streets of Paris, it is impossible to go hungry. There are yummy cakes and pastries at every turn. On this particular occasion The LCs enjoyed a very nice lemon tart.



We stumbled across this Jewish cafe which had some excellent boreks, jam packed with heaps of vegetarian-friendly ingredients.




Then it was on to the world-famous falafel place, to see what the fuss was about.



...and the fuss was certainly justified. Soft pita bread with freshly-cooked light, crunchy falafel balls on a bed of grilled eggplant and salad with a healthy dollop of hommus on top. We all got amongst it whilst on the go. Douglas got particularly excited with it and after the falafel was long gone, he continued to march through the streets of Paris with hommus all over his face (we tried to tell him, but we were laughing too hard).




For more info on St Marcellin cheese

L'As du Fallafel Located in the Jewish Quarter (Marais) at 34 Rue de Rosiers
Aux Lyonnais 2nd Arrondissement (La Bourse) at 32 rue St-Marc

...to be continued in France: they hate vegetarians Part 2

D&D day

I have to say that I've always found my bloke's secret Dungeons and Dragons life rather intriguing. Every so often they congregate for a game which lasts an entire day - so I, wanting to see want it was all about, offered to cook for them. Unfortunately, I'm still no closer to understanding what it is they actually do with those crazy 20-sided dice, but this is what i made...




What you need
1 cucumber, halved length ways, seeds removed and sliced thinly
2 red capsicum, sliced thinly
1 cup of frozen peas, cooked
noodles, cooked until just soft, rinsed under cold water and drained - I used Chinese quick cooking noodles (Japanese somen or soba noodles would also work a treat. OR thin spaghetti snapped in half before cooking would might also work well)
Japanese mayonnaise
sesame seeds
sesame oil




The do
In a big bowl, add the drained noodles and vegetables. Drizzle with sesame oil and add mayonnaise to taste (because I'm obsessed with Japanese mayonnaise, I added a lot, but some people like less). Using your hands mix everything together thoroughly. Set aside.
In a frying pan on medium flame, heat a few tablespoons of sesame seeds until golden and pour evenly over the top of the salad.



I served these with my corn cakes

Chilly fusilli

Pasta salad is misunderstood. Its vintage association with seventies barbecues and cheap salad bars have done it untold damage (I’m looking at you, Swagman).* But fuck all that because a good one is bloody delicious.

Obviously cold fusilli on its own is not the least bit exciting, which is why you need to dress it with a feisty blend of clingy flavours. Adding a little razzle dazzle on the side can distract from its smorgasbord roots (tonight's grilled and seasoned aubergines come courtesy of the River Café Cook Book) but is not entirely necessary. After chowing it all down, Adam happily declared he could eat this for dinner forever.



* If you have 30 seconds to lose, visit the Swagman link for what is sadly one of the most memorable TV ads of my childhood.

Base salad ingredients (for 2 pretty large serves)
1 big cup of wholeweat fusilli pasta
1/2 a continental cucumber (chopped into small slices)
200g feta cheese
1 handful cherry tomatoes (halved)
1 spring onion, finely chopped
Handful of blanched almonds
Handful of fresh basil leaves

Marinated mushrooms ingredients
250g button mushrooms (halved)
Japanese Soya Sauce
Balsamic Vinegar
A hefty teaspoon of Miso paste mixed with around 1/3 cup of water
1 clove garlic (finely sliced)


Extra dressing
Olive oil
Juice 1 lemon

And you’ll need 1 med-large eggplant/ aubergine.



Doing it
Don't worry too much about quantities. Any leftovers make for killer next day lunch box filler.

Cook your pasta then cool it straight away in cold water and set it aside to drain. Mix all your other salad ingredients together in a large bowl (crumbling the feta with your fingies).

Dry fry the blanched almonds in a hot pan, turning frequently to prevent them burning. Once they are lightly toasted, set them aside to cool then add them to your salad.

The mushroom marinade was entirely spontaneous so use whatever you've got. I mixed a big splash of balsamic vinegar, soya sauce and diluted miso paste in a bowl then thoroughly tossed through the button mushrooms and sliced garlic. Let the mush absorb the juice for a few minutes then pour the whole lot into a hot pan and cook it until the juice has reduced to a caramely sludge. Set aside to cool.

Finely slice your eggplant and grill it on both sides then toss it in olive oil, lemon juice and seasoning.

Thoroughly mix your pasta and mushrooms (with any juice) through the salad then pile it onto a plate alongside your sliced eggplant.

Lily Vs Chew Iron Chef

CHEW: A while back Lily and I did our weekly food shop together at Borough market. Lily came up with the bonza idea of Iron Chef-ing each other - buying each other an ingredient we'd never really cooked with before.

LILY: I went for the lazy approach, picking something for Chew that I'd often bought with good intentions just to watch shrivel into a moulding heap on my kitchen windowsill because I didn't know what to do with it: Jerusalem Artichoke.

CHEW: I'd always meant to give Jerusalem artichokes a go, but for some reason I never got around to it. So when Lily, with an evil glint in her eye, handed me a brown paper bag containing this knobbly root vegetable I was secretly pleased. Never one to step down from a challenge, I then made a beeline for the weird mushroom shop, where I knew I would find something that would really freak Lily out.

LILY: Chew managed to dig out something so impossible to get to know it didn't even have a wikipedia entry. The sign said Baba de Fratta, an exotic name for a limp bunch of tentacles, like the flailing arms of green sea anemone. The first bite was weird: crunchy, salty, grassy and juicy all at once. 'Good boiled in salads,' was all I could get out of the greengrocer.



CHEW: After a little Google action, I learnt a few things about this knobbly little root vegetable.
1. It has no link to the globe artichoke
2. It is also known as a sunchoke
3. Jerusalem artichokes cause huge amounts of gas (!)

My search results yielded some salads and soups but they all lacked wow-factor. I couldn't enter a cook-off with Lily and make plain old soup. Finally a recipe for Jerusalem artichoke souffle from the Riverford website caught my eye, mainly because I've never attempted a souffle before and it sounded fancy.

LILY:On d-day I was drooling all over Carluccio's (with my seaweed in my handbag) and I thought, hell's bells, I'll kick this thing with a fancy pizza. Thin crust with baba, gorgonzola, procini mushrooms and some truffle-infused dried berries (an idea I stole from my sister in law, Mish). Surprisingly, it worked, with the saltiness of the green matching the earthier porcini and truffle (although I am sure there are far less heavy handed ways of using this green to lend an interesting flavour).



CHEW: The big day. Lily and Adam are due to arrive in an hour's time. I get all my ingredients together and turn on the scales.
Nothing happens.
Flashing battery icon.
ARRRGHHH! Battery-operated scales seemed such a good idea. I should have known they would have a drawback.

Usually I would push on despite the setback but my limited knowledge of souffle making has taught me that precision is the key. All of a sudden it was meet-the-neighbours time. Maybe we should have done this years ago, but this being London we were afraid they'd answer the door naked with a machete. Five minutes later we knew one thing about all our neighbours - they don't own kitchen scales.

Time for Plan B. I sent my faithful apprentice to the local shop for some new provisions.

LILY:If I hadn't bumped into Mr Chew running around Sainsbury's Express like a headless chook (while I too scrabbled for forgotten ingredients), I would have been none the wiser to Chew's last minute kitchen dramas. Her Jerusalem Artichoke Dauphinoise was the ants pants, with the lemony artichokes offsetting the richness of the cream a treat. Better than its potato brethren I reckon.

CHEW: Lily really pulled out the big guns with her gourmet pizza. The crunchy/saltiness of the Barba worked in perfect harmony with the creamy robustness of the gorgonzola, and the truffle/berry combo was like a party in my mouth.

LILY:Chew's bloke -- vastly more patient and linguistically advanced than I -- did a more thorough google search at the dinner table and so we realised the actual spelling of my Mediterranean vegetable is Barba di Frate (friar's beard). And, yes, it does rate a mention on wikipedia after all.

IRON CHEF RECIPE 1: Jerusalem Artichoke Bake

What you need
3 big potatoes thinly sliced
a handful of Jerusalem artichokes thinly sliced
1 cup of cream
parmesan, grated
rosemary and thyme, chopped

The do
Preheat oven to 180
If you're short on time like I was, parboil the potatoes and jerusalem artichoke until semi cooked. Drain. Butter up an A4-sized oven tray and spread a thin layer of potato and artichoke on it. Splash on some cream, cheese, pepper a tiny bit of salt, then some of the chopped herbs. repeat twice. Finish off the top layer with a good layer of cheese and place in oven. It is ready when a fork goes right in and the cheese goes crunchy. Serve it like you never even heard of souffle - surround it with good green leaves and crusty bread.


IRON CHEF RECIPE 2: Barba di Frate Pizza

What you need

A pizza base (however you like it) and enough of the following to load it with:
Olive oil
Raisins or dried berries
Porcini mushrooms (wash and soak them as directed)
Fresh mushrooms – regular or you could go oyster or shiitake
A sloppy chunk of gorgonzola (be sure to lick the plastic wrap clean – it’s all about keeping your rubbish green)
Truffle oil
That crazy baba shit

Doing It

Turn your oven on to 210C. Brush your base with olive oil. Be sure to wash your porcinis good before you soak them cos grit is shit. Place the berries in a bowl then douse them in truffle oil and mix them all about. Clean your baba, chop off its roots, dunk it in salted boiling water for a couple of minutes then rinse it with cold. Slice the fresh mush thin and put it on your base, followed by baba (probably best chopped but I went big and flamboyant). Toss your berries and porcini on top with lots of fresh, grated pepper. Slop on some big wads of gorgonzola then zap it all in the oven for… ahem, this all happened so long ago I honestly can’t remember. But, you know, cook it till it’s pizzarific. And try to keep your mouth closed while munching.

Tomyummy

A few Saturdays ago, I was hanging with the ladies on a hen do. We spent most of the day at a Burlesque afternoon tea, sipping daintily on champagne and chowing down on sandwiches, scones and cakes.
Fast forward to dinner time.
We stumbled over to Bam-bou for more cocktails and amazingly enough, more food. While I was probably too drunk to give an accurate account of the feast that was laid out before me. I will say that it was delicious, and one thing that did stand out was the spicy tomato soup...
...which I tried to recreate as a main for Sarah and Nat when they came over for dinner later that week.




What you need
Half a big red chili, sliced
One stalk of lemongrass, pounded and tied in a knot
1 onion, chopped in half then sliced thinly
a few teaspoons of vegetable bouillon
half a thumb of ginger, thinly sliced
1 bunch of coriander, chopped
1 bunch of Thai basil (or normal basil), chopped
a handful of Vietnamese coriander
a few spring onions, chopped
12 normal sized vine tomatoes, chopped into small cubes


The do
In a big pot, heat a few splashes of oil and fry chili, onion, ginger and lemongrass. When onion begins to brown, add tomatoes, fry for a few minutes. Boil a kettle of water (approx 2L) and pour into pot. Add bouillon, taste and add more if required. Turn heat down and allow to simmer for about half an hour to an hour.
Just before serving, add all the chopped herbs and stir. Season with a little soy if needed and serve with your favourite noodles. I choose superfine white Chinese noodles. Vermicelli would work well too.


During dinner, Nat showed us the form she had to fill out at the police station about how her leg got squashed between two cars. One requirement was to draw the accident scene, which we all found so hilarious we almost choked on our extra-fine noodles.



P.S For another variation on tomato soup, check out Lily's Spicy roast tomato soup

a tasty ear for a cosy night in

After getting a bit sauced on Friday night, Saturday laziness demanded comfort food for hungry bellies. I had the mac cheese craving but wanted something a little more silky and luxuriant on the taste buds. A rummage around the cupboard, fridge and herb pots gave me the splendid chewiness of orecchiette pasta, a handful of olives, a bag of mushies, fresh basil and parsley and, to really kick it up a notch, some truffle infused olive oil... all punching around the thigh-bulking cheeeeeesiness of cheddarfied white sauce.



Before I give you the shizzle I want to point out that the original recipe came from a North American book. I looked at '1/4 cup butter' for a long time hoping it would make sense. In the end, all I heard was... "I knew these people, these two people. They were in love with each other..." So I cut off a slab and hoped for the best. It seemed to work. That's as precise as I can be. Also, it really is worth using orecchiette pasta here. The name translates as 'little ears' and they are THAT satisfying to chew threw.

This is adapted from Jennifer Warren's basic mac cheese recipe in her book, Vegetarian Comfort Food.

What you need

Orecchiette (or your favourite noodles) for 2
Olive flesh cut off the pip (about 10 olives)
A dozen (or so) sliced shiitake mushrooms
1/4 cup butter
1/4 cup flour
1.5 cups soy milk
Good pinch of sumac
A little girl's handful of chopped fresh parsley
Salt and pepper
1 cup of grated cheddar
Fresh basil leaves
2 spring onions (sliced)
Truffle oil

Making it

This is a multi tasking affair. Turn the oven onto 200(c)/400(f). Bring a pot of water to the boil and cook your pasta while you make the sauce.

Sauce

Melt the butter in a saucepan, sift and whisk in the flour then gradually whisk in 3/4 cup of the milk. Remove from heat and continue whisking while you add the sumac, parsley and 1/2 cup of cheese. Return to the heat and add the rest of the milk. Stir constantly, bringing it to the boil for a couple of minutes. Season to taste.

Meanwhile

Drain and season your little ears then toss them in a bowl with the olives, spring onions and mushrooms. Empty the mix into an oven proof dish and pour your sauce all over it. Give it a shake and sprinkle the top with the other 1/2 cup of cheese then pop it in the oven for a good ten minutes. Nuke the top under the grill or with a cook's torch, blow torch, lighter & aerosol. Scoop out into bowls, drizzle with truffle oil and sprinkle the top with fresh basil leaves. Get comfy and press play for...

"...The girl was very young, about 17 or 18 I guess. And the guy was quite a bit older. He was raggedy and wild..."

Crunch time

Stir-fried celery
Here's an easy dish I picked up during my travels in China. It's simple, delicious and refreshing.

What you need
4 stalks of celery cut into 2 cm chunks
roasted cashews
black bean and garlic paste (from the Chinese grocer)

The do
In a hot wok or frying pan, heat some peanut oil, throw in celery, then add 1-2 tablespoons of black bean paste. Mix well, then add half a ladle of boiling water. Fry for another half a minute then throw in cashews. Mix. Sprinkle with sesame seeds and top with a little sesame oil. The key with this dish is speed. Don't overcook or the celery will lose its crunch.
Serve with hot white or brown rice.
Serves 2-3 people

Rollin' Rollin' Rollin'

Having Nat around has been great because it has motivated me flex my culinary muscle. The other night I decided to make sushi rolls. I had wanted to do this three weeks prior, but got sidetracked and now the cucumber I purchased for the occasion has turned into brown mouldy mush held together in its original form by the plastic wrapping. After disposing the ex-cucumber, I suss out the contents of the fridge. Eggplant, chestnut mushrooms from the mushroom guy, avocado, salad leaves. Not typical sushi roll ingredients, but I'll make them work because I can't be arsed walking to the shops.

What you need
2 small eggplants, thinly sliced
3 handfuls of mushrooms (I used chestnut and portabello), thinly sliced
2 handfuls of salad leaves
half an avocado
miso paste
teriyaki sauce
salad leaves (like rocket, or mizuma - japanese rocket/parsley)
Kewpie mayonnaise

The do

The mushroom filling
In a hot pan with a little oil, fry the mushrooms with a few shakes of teriyaki sauce. Cook until all the liquid has disappeared then remove from heat and set aside.

The eggplant filling
Mix 2 tablespoons of miso paste with 2 chinese teacups of boiling water and a teaspoon of sugar. In a medium pan with a little oil, add eggplant and miso mixture. Cook until soft, remove from heat and set aside.

Now you are ready to roll!
For full instructions on sushi rolling, look here

I filled mine with:
Avocado + Kewpie mayonnaise + black sesame seeds
Eggplant mixture + salad
Miso mushroom + salad

Serve with the usual wasabi and gari (pickled ginger) combo

broccolini salad

Moving out of SE1 and into EC1 has meant bidding a sad farewell to Borough Market and a frosty hello to Waitrose as the nearest provider of groceries until I get my arse around to having a weekly box delivered. After avoiding all big supermarkets for two years it is frankly depressing. But a curious thing happened the other day. I found myself buying all sorts of fancy veggies the likes of which I wouldn't normally look twice at on a market stall. Broccolini might be de rigeur for some but I've never so much as given it a sideways glance before. And then there's the plate arrangement. Odd, very odd.

What you need for the salad

Broccolini spears
1 witlof
Lemon juice
Salt'n'peppa

Getting it on

Chop off the witlof stalk then discard any crappy outer leaves and the core. Separate, wash and dry the remaining leaves then arrange 6 to 8 of the bigger ones on your plate in the shape of flower petals if your posh heart so desires. Chop the rest into small pieces. Bring some salted water to the boil. Add the broccolini for two minutes, then drain and plunge into cold water to stop it cooking. Drain, toss with the chopped witlof, a bit of lemon juice and salt'n'peppa then arrange the broccolini mix on the witlof leaves.

For the pesto cream

I didn't want the hardcore oily richness of a regular parmesan pesto so I improvised.

A large handful of big basil leaves
A handful of pine nuts
A generous glug of olive oil
A generous glug of red wine vinegar
About 6 cornichons (optional)
A generous tablespoon of cream or yoghurt
Salt and pepper to taste
A squeeze of lemon juice

Getting it on

To make the pesto, all you really need to do is mix all the ingredients together in a blender. But I'd advise adding the oil, vinegar and cream/yoghurt a little at a time to taste until you achieve the desired tartness and creaminess. And hey presto, fancy pesto is all yours.

ravishing Ravioli and comely cupcakes

Guy dropped into our new flat on Saturday evening then we strolled to his for dinner. I say this because it's amazing to be able to walk between houses in London at all, it's so huge, rather than it being some sort of progressive dinner party (especially given all I offered by way of nibbles was a bag of twiglets).

When we arrived at Guy's he pulled out the kitchen stadium big guns; scrumptious potato, rosemary and parmesan ravioli with wild mushrooms followed by his signature dessert: cup cakes (this time, Lemon Four Ways). Adam and I waddled home trashed and very, very full.



Here are Guy's recipes, straight from the horse's mouth (with a few editorial changes so they make sense). It looks stupidly long but, remember, we are making pasta, sauce and dessert from scratch, people!! So deep breaths and leave your ADHD at the door...

Both the pasta recipe and filling were adapted from Giorgio Locatelli’s Made in Italy: Food and Stories. You will get four decent serves.

For the pasta:

500gm strong flour
3 eggs
2 extra egg yolks
salt
Olive oil

Making it:

Make a well in the flour and mix in the eggs, first with spoon then your hands. I also then push a small hole into the dough and fill it with olive oil and knead for about 10 minutes until well combined. Cover in a damp cloth and sit for 30 minutes.

Roll out with a pasta maker (or rolling pin). Cut into circles to make ravioli pockets.

For the filling:

200gm potatoes
100gm paremesan cheese (grated)
100gm butter
Sprig rosemary
Salt and pepper to season

Making and cooking the ravioli:

Chop, boil, drain and mash the potatoes. Melt the butter with the rosemary sprig in it then remove the rosemary. Add the melted butter and grated cheese to the potatoes. Season with salt and pepper and combine. Fill the ravioli circles using either a mould or buy placing a blob of filling onto the centre of one side of your circle, then folding it over and pressing the edges together. Locatelli added a mint leaf to each ravioli which I did not.

You can make the ravioli ahead of time. Just cover them and put them in the fridge until you need them.

When the sauce is five to ten minutes away, drop the ravioli into boiling, salted water (a few at a time.) Let them rise to the surface then carefully ladel them out with a slotted spoon and place them in dishes.



For the sauce:

Olive oil
2 cloves garlic, crushed
A few sprigs of fresh thyme
1 cup red wine
1/2 cup of veggie or mushroom stock
Salt and pepper to season
3 lots of fancy mushrooms. I chose enoki, oyster and some orangey ones (girolle). Choose them for looks. I like enoki as they taste great and have an interesting texture.
Grated parmesan to serve



Heat some oil, add crushed garlic, then the mushrooms and thyme. Add the more robust mushrooms first (enoki only go in for a few minutes at the end). Once the first mushrooms are starting to soften, add 1 cup of red wine, follwed by some stock and salt and pepper. Cook for no longer than 10 minutes so they don't shrivel too much, but enough to reduce and thicken the sauce.



CUPCAKES: LEMON FOUR WAYS



For the cupcakes:

125gm butter
125gm flour
125gm caster sugar
1 tsp baking powder
3 teaspoons vanilla
3 eggs
Zest of two lemons

Making them:

Beat the eggs, sugar, lemon zest and vanilla together. Mix in the sifted flour and baking powder. Melt the butter and stir it into the mix. Divide the mixture between 12 cupcake moulds. Bake for 8 mins at 180C. (For a base cupcake recipe, omit the lemon zest.)

Once baked, I drizzled the cupcakes with lemon syrup (heat the juice of 2 lemons with 150g of sugar until the sugar dissolves) and then made a cut in the cupcakes and filled them with lemon curd.



For the frosting:

125 gm butter
small box of icing sugar (500 gm)
vanilla
Juice and zest of 1 lemon

Whisk all the ingredients together until fluffy. You can cut down on butter and add milk or water if it is too buttery.